Man, Bear, or Amipotent God?

By Janel Apps Ramsey

An amipotent God cares about women and wants them to live a life full of wholeness.

CW: Discussion of Rape and Sexual Assault

I walked into the discussion room, not knowing how it would go. We were discussing the Man vs. Bear meme. If a woman was walking in the woods, would she rather run into a man or a bear? Women were universally choosing bear, and the men were getting angry. I knew that we could have a conversation about it, but I did not necessarily know how it would go.

The first week we had a powerful time of sharing. I made sure that women’s voices were heard first and asked that we prioritize women’s voices in the discussion. We shared the statistics below, as well as others. It was a serious conversation, even with some of the silly memes printed and sitting on the table.

Week two when I walked in, I was the only woman for the first 20 minutes. It was awkward. We had a few repeat visitors and several new men around the table. We went through some of the list of things women experience on a regular basis. Things were quiet.

These are things the women in your life have done at some point. (For all the women around the table on week one, each had done multiples of these.)

•     Carry your keys in your hand as a “weapon” when walking alone at night.

•     Turn your headphones off to make sure you are not being followed.

•     Call friends when alone in a taxi/Uber in order to feel safe.

•     When being verbally harassed, stay silent out of fear that if you fight back, it will turn violent.

•     Make sure a friend always knows where you are if you are going on a first date.

•     Sit near other women on public transport to minimize the risk of harassment.

•     Pretend to be on the phone in any number of situations to avoid harassment.

We then went on to talk about the meme—how it felt for women and how it felt for men. When bringing up the fact that I too would choose bear, I made sure to make an exception for the men in the room. I trust them. I know they have my back. I feel safe with them.

But even in that room, especially on the first night, I felt the need to qualify why we were talking about this and why it mattered. I am often told I take this issue too seriously and that I come across as angry when I present on feminism (tone policing and cultural expectations.) I have been told in other spaces, more times than I can count, that I need to smile more and be more approachable, that I sound angry and have a chip on my shoulder—things that strong women everywhere get used to hearing. Things you may have heard and agreed with about the women in your life.

But the thing is, those assumptions are part of the problem. Thankfully, that night, one of the men said—hell no, you do not need to apologize or qualify any of this. It was a moment, in the context of this essay, of the amipotent Spirit breaking through the easy answers that the patriarchy provides. It was a moment when the Spirit was welcomed, and a man stood in solidarity with me. It was a moment of solidarity repeated throughout our conversation both nights, in the face of culture that might not understand what was happening.

The men in that room could choose whether to be influenced by the amipotent Spirit. They could choose to accept the invitation toward equality and wholeness, or they could give into the power of patriarchy.

But in every moment, there is a choice. A choice that empowers the possibility of living in a different kind of world. A kind of world that opens the door toward everyone having a voice, loving, and living equally—as empowered by the amipotent Spirit.

When given the choice between man or bear, women choose bear. When given the choice between an omnipotent God or bear, women would still choose bear. However, when given the choice between an amipotent God and bear, God would fare much better.

It is hard to walk through this world as a woman and believe that God is omnipotent. Because if God is, God certainly does not like you very much. The suffering that women experience now and throughout time, makes believing in an omnipotent God difficult at best. If God is able to control everything, then why do women suffer so much? Since God created us as equals, why would God continue, for millennia, to let their creation endure mistreatment?

Simple statistics on the realities of being female in our culture, clearly lay out why it would be hard to believe in omnipotence. (RAINN.org, nsvrc.org, who.int)

•     1:6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime. The NSVRC reports it at 1:5.

•     Globally about 1 in 3 (30%) of women worldwide have been subjected to either physical and/or sexual intimate partner violence or non-partner sexual violence in their lifetime.

•     Every 68 seconds another American is sexually assaulted. And ­every 9 minutes, that victim is a child.

•     About 3% of American men—or 1 in 33—have experienced an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime.

•     9 out of 10 victims of rape are female

•     8 out of 10 sexual assaults are committed by someone known to the victim.

Created to be co-creators of humanity, women suffer at the hands of others, most often men. The ability to carry a new life to term comes with dangerous possibilities—rape, pregnancy from rape, dying from a non-viable pregnancy, and female genital mutilation (FGM) to name a few. Then there are the day-to-day assaults: teasing, judgment for what you wear or do not wear, people brushing up against your body parts and/or grabbing them, called names of all sorts, accused of tempting men, talked over, talked past, and flat out ignored. Then there are the things you witnessed, like jokes about elephant penises at a church staff meeting or repetitions of penal, penial, penis in any conversation where a phallic joke might be made. (Not making this up. Just ask the women you know, and they will have stories.)

Being a woman comes at a cost. It is a cost that never goes away. A cost you bump up against whether you are in the church or the world. Bias against women is something we see everywhere. Systemically it is called patriarchy. Patriarchy is a force that sees women as less than and seeks to oppress women. Within a patriarchal framework, it is believed that men are more powerful, and family lines are traced through men. Patriarchy leads to misogyny—people that hate women. Misogyny often comes from men but can also show up as bias against women of a certain caste from women of privilege.

Bias against women is a mechanism of power. Bias decides who gets to have power and who gets to make decisions. Bias against women shows up as name calling, slut shaming, violence, and systemic oppression. Even today, voices are rising in America, and around the world, to use control over women and their bodies to control society.

Since this is the world we live in, an omnipotent God must be a part of that oppression. It would mean God sees God’s own creation as less than. It means that God would be working against women and not protecting them. It means that for most women, if caught in the woods with an omnipotent God or a bear, they would still choose the bear. A God that endorses the abuse of women—by not stopping it—when God has the power to, is not a God that belongs in power.

However, an Amipotent God is another story. God’s greater commitment to love limits God’s power, which leaves us to fix patriarchy and oppression together. God will do all God can to make life better for women. An Amipotent God stands in relationship with women. God is wounded every time women suffer simply because of their sex or gender. An Amipotent God can co-create safe spaces for women, can heal the wounds that women suffer, and can move the hearts and souls of willing men to stand up for women.

Promoting the overall wellbeing of women means helping to create a culture that nurtures the right of women to live fully into wholeness. On a longer arc, it means creating a culture, a world, where women are equal as God intended in creation. A world where women can live into the fullness of their gifts and talents. Where there does not need to be competition or threat along gendered lines. It means repairing the world to reflect equality across all humanity.

By prioritizing love and loving relationships, an amipotent God empowers humans to continually build each other up and help each other have their needs met, to find safety in each other, and to live in fullness. It may even sound achievable. At creation, that fullness was the intention, and it continues to be the intention whether or not it exists today. The relational amipotent God is part of that equation.

An amipotent understanding of God brings a great sigh of relief to women. That there is, in this world, the real possibility of living at rest. No longer looking over our shoulder at every moment or hoping to be taken seriously when our car breaks down but knowing that it is with the power of humanity, in each and every moment, to let the influence of a God defined and driven by love, to bring about a different reality. An amipotent God is a God of hope for women. The very women God created to birth hope into the world.

Bio: Janel Apps Ramsey is Co-Director of Brew Theology and Co-host of the Brew Theology Podcast. She is the Co-Editor of Women Experiencing Faith. She is an ordained interfaith leader and does interfaith climate organizing. She lives in Denver, CO with her husband, Baird, and their floof, Aurora. She enjoys mountains, journeying with people through faith transitions, and many different crafts.

OORD’S DRABBLE* RESPONSE

Janel Apps Ramsey makes a compelling case for the compatibility of amipotence with key issues in women’s experiences. The widespread harm inflicted on women highlights that many, especially men, do not cooperate with an amipotent God. Because divine love is inherently uncontrolling, God cannot prevent this harm. If God were omnipotent, God would bear at least indirect responsibility for failing to stop such evil. Janel is right that the amipotence view offers hope, allowing women to breathe a “sigh of relief.” “God can’t” is hopeful, because God isn’t passively allowing harm. “God could but chooses not to” ends in despair.

For more on Oord’s view Mary, women, and hope, see this article.

* A drabble is an essay exactly 100 words in length.